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Travelling the World

Seems @coolonespa disagrees with you also @Solent_Richard
Certainly after 52 years of marriage I cannot imagine there being anything that my wife and I can’t discuss.

London

Fossil wrote:

Totally disagree, can’t imagine anything being too difficult to discuss between a true partnership.

Good morning @Fossil

And therein lies the problem.

True partnerships – Not always what they appear to be I believe.

When I made my comment I of course expected you to disagree with me, but at least I got a reaction. This is after all a forum for discussion and as we often are reminded, individual’s opinions are part of the debate though it would appear we are drifting from the core ‘Travel’ theme.

Solent_Richard wrote:

my view is that if it is too difficult to discuss then it shouldn’t be discussed.

Totally disagree, can’t imagine anything being too difficult to discuss between a true partnership.

London

Solent_Richard wrote:

my view is that if it is too difficult to discuss then it shouldn’t be discussed.

Certainly not my view. If its an issue, get it out on the table and talk about it. I can perceive where one partner has a simmering resentment that they cannot follow their interest that could eventually turn into a full scale “explosion”.

Still there’s all sorts of relationships, different strokes for different folks, there’s no one model for success.

Essex UK

coolonespa wrote:

if you have a partner at home – it makes sense to people that you have someone but don’t always want to do the same thing.

Logically its a no brainier but the focus of the radio discussion was that (for some couples) it was a difficult subject to bring up if you’ve always travelled together. Perhaps as a couple you’ve always holidayed with the kids or working pressures have meant you can only fit in one holiday together. Empty nest, retirement, extra funds may present the opportunity to have the extra solo trip(s) but some felt it was a difficult conversation to have with their partner.

While I have travelled on a small number of occasions ‘as a solo’ that’s generally been to fulfil either an ambition (a silver backpacker) or a hobby (Scuba Diving) and I would generally say that my partner (Don’t really like that word – the lady is my legally married my wife) would want to be with me. Indeed, I find it a very odd concept that some folk happily abandon their spouses on a regular basis: it wouldn’t happen in our home. If we couldn’t afford to travel together we wouldn’t go.

Like @Fossil I too did a solo cruise with Fred Olsen. That was entirely due to an itinerary that I really fancied (A two week Amazon cruise) clashing with my wife’s singing engagements. It was certainly an interesting experience as far as getting to know the other solo travellers – one other male and six females. Needless to say I was in great demand.

As regards holding a discussion with one’s partner on the subject my view is that if it is too difficult to discuss then it shouldn’t be discussed.

@JoCarroll wrote:

if you have a partner at home – it makes sense to people that you have someone but don’t always want to do the same thing.

Logically its a no brainier but the focus of the radio discussion was that (for some couples) it was a difficult subject to bring up if you’ve always travelled together. Perhaps as a couple you’ve always holidayed with the kids or working pressures have meant you can only fit in one holiday together. Empty nest, retirement, extra funds may present the opportunity to have the extra solo trip(s) but some felt it was a difficult conversation to have with their partner.

Essex UK

The ‘looking for a partner’ thing is interesting – I’ve found too many people assume, as soon as I say I’m widowed, that I’m looking for a replacement – often not listening when I say I’m fine on my own, and one even giving me a lecture on how to find someone online. I’ve even had women make sure they always stood between me and their husbands (as if, in my widowed status, I might leap on any old fat bloke).

Maybe it’s different if you have a partner at home – it makes sense to people that you have someone but don’t always want to do the same thing. But being on my own and not even looking – that’s the bit that challenges people. (So far I’ve not actually been rude to anyone!)

Did a cruise as a solo with Fred Olsen a couple of years ago and met some very interesting people all from different walks of life with different life stories. I would thoroughly recommend it if your other half agrees to it.

London

coolonespa wrote:

nespa
09:01 03-Mar-19
17

@JoCarroll wrote:

nor are we looking for partners

I think that was the subtle subtitle of the discussion. It focussed a bit on how you would approach the subject with your partner that it was OK to have individual holidays (as well as joint ones) & that people on solo trips were there to follow an interest, not find romance.

On a recent cruise we met 2 delightful sisters who were cruising together. Neither husband liked cruising. In fact one was doing a solo tour of a part of the US on his Harley whilst she was on the cruise.

My husband doesn’t like cruising either. And I’m certainly not looking anything extra-marital – I make that very clear – I just love visiting lots of different places and the cosseted shipboard life. He used to go off on walking holidays (I have breathing difficulties so can’t walk far) and also sailing (I get terribly seasick on small boats, so that’s a no-no also). For a while, he kept a sailing boat in Florida and would go off there for 2 or 3 months at a time, whilst I held the fort at home, but at around 76 he decided he was no longer fit enough for single-handed sailing, so gave it up. This works for us.

Albox, Costa Almeria, Spain

@JoCarroll wrote:

nor are we looking for partners

I think that was the subtle subtitle of the discussion. It focussed a bit on how you would approach the subject with your partner that it was OK to have individual holidays (as well as joint ones) & that people on solo trips were there to follow an interest, not find romance.

On a recent cruise we met 2 delightful sisters who were cruising together. Neither husband liked cruising. In fact one was doing a solo tour of a part of the US on his Harley whilst she was on the cruise.

Essex UK
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